Calm as a clam they say....

Cancer's horoscope for today says that I may appear calm as a clam, yet others may not realize that my hard outer shell is preventing them from seeing my unsettled emotions. That 's quite close from reality. Every fiber in my body aches. Last time I felt like this was when my beloved dog died, thought I'd never feel like this ever. Even if I try to look and feel better, something inside's broken, broken beyond my understanding. How to heal this time? What to choose? should I just quit all?

Once some ol pal told me that even if you are unsure, making a decision frees you up so that you are able to move on. My problem today is that I'm not sure what to decide, or perhaps is thatI don't want to take that decision...this little voice that keeps me going in this directions keeps yelling at me to hang on, but ...hope has cracked.

I started this year in the eye of the storm, since yesterday...no more aparent peace....the boat just sank...the tempest is unleashed....tame it I need...peace o' mind I need...myself I need...


Miranda, The tempest, R. Waterhouse, 1916